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How to stop being a good girl? 5 effective tips

Being a good girl is very, very bad. Because you can’t try to please everyone around you and at the same time maintain adequate self-esteem. Cinderella syndrome has never brought anyone into the arms of a handsome prince, but it has turned many into draft horses.

Stop guessing other people's wishes

Learn to fulfill your own desires. For starters, you can at least write them down. Very sobering. When you get tired of staring at a blank sheet of paper for half an hour, you will realize how long it has been since you thought about what you yourself want. Consider the first step taken.

Start praising yourself

It helps. After some time, you will notice that your own opinion has been cured of muteness and is blathering something subtly. Mimimi, look how pretty it is!

Have a holiday of disobedience

Choose something that annoys you, but you have to do it - and don’t do it. On Parent meeting, for example, don't go. This week. On the next one, don’t do anything else. And the sky will not collapse to the ground, you will see for yourself.

Stop making excuses

What to do about it? Catching yourself by the hand and switching, there’s no other way, alas. If you feel that you are again looking for excuses for yourself, distract yourself immediately. As you wish. Call a friend, chat about something, surf the net, read a book. Nip the monologue in the bud. It will be easier to do this each time. And then you’ll learn to refuse, because it turns out it’s not scary at all.

Get involved in conflict

And then all you have to do is fall for that same provocation. Don't apologize and hide in the fog, as usual, but open your mouth and... Well, you'll figure it out as the play progresses. That's all. You are a bad girl. Three cheers, comrades!

I thought for a long time about what an ideal girl should be like. There were a lot of thoughts on this matter, but I still tried to somehow systematize them. Here is a list of qualities that you should have perfect girl in my mind. As necessary, I will decipher it in more detail. So,
1. Be beautiful. Beauty is not 90\60\90. These are just your feelings. A person can be comfortable at 65 kilograms. And it is at this weight that a girl can feel ideal. Here everyone has their own canons and rules. Of course, it is worth remembering that 1. Men are not dogs, they don’t throw themselves at bones. and 2. Rubens' women have not been in fashion for a long time. But everything in between is yours. Decide for yourself. The main thing here is personal feelings.
2. Confident. Beautiful posture, head held high. The main thing here is not to overdo it, otherwise He will think that you are a pompous, pretentious chicken.
3. Be active. Men love active girls, their eyes sparkle, they do everything quickly and well. So if you have problems with the second one, slow down. Otherwise He will say about you “every barrel has a plug.” This happens very often.
4. Take initiative. Diversify your everyday life. Offer something non-standard. For example, a sudden trip out of town for the weekend.
5. Surprise. Let not everything in life go according to the proven scenario. Leave room for surprises. Every little detail is important here. A new refrigerator magnet with a nice inscription, a sticker on the mirror with the imprint of your lips. Imagine, surprise.
6. Inspire. Teach him to appreciate your every gesture, every smile, every gentle glance.
7. Support. A man loves to be told that he is the best/favorite/reliable. They are strong, but always need support.
8. Don't advise. Men rarely love and take into account women's advice. This does not mean that he does not love and appreciate you. They just look at life from a different angle.
If a woman is smart (well, I don’t consider the “be smart” rule, everything is clear with that), she will make sure that the man’s decision is her decision. Only the man himself won’t even guess about it. But you shouldn’t bother him and approach him with your opinion.
9. Create comfort. The woman is the keeper of the hearth. It creates coziness and comfort. This means order, things laid out, a deliciously prepared dinner and always a neat appearance. Coming home from work, a man wants to have dinner and enjoy your company. Be prepared for the fact that he may be in a bad mood. Therefore, the nest you created should distract him from all extraneous thoughts.
10. Sociable. You should know his friends. And accept them as they are. You must be in the same company and on the same wavelength. Do you know how men like to introduce their girls to their friends? And pride in you, the best, is bursting if they see that you are positive towards them.
11. Be yourself. There is no need for antics, embarrassment, antics. Stay true to yourself in any situation. Be more natural.
12. Smile more often and don’t grumble. Men don't like girls who constantly have some kind of problem. Treat everything more simply and your man will decide everything for you. :)

13. KNOW YOUR MOTION. Everything I wrote about above is undoubtedly very necessary qualities. But overdoing any of them will only cause a backlash. Do not overdo it!

I haven’t been writing much about my life lately, I know. Somehow everything is still a heap and very unclear. I promise to improve one of these days. :)

Around beautiful and nice girls There are always a lot of men hanging around. Serious competition implies the need to be better than the rest of the unshaven characters in her life. How to be the best for her?

She will have someone. Can not beautiful girls to be alone. She has someone or even a couple of men in mind. She might be dating someone. But what did you want? Tidbits do not go unnoticed. You need to be the best, special and different. Then you can win her.

How to be the best for a girl?

Give unexpected compliments

Does she have beautiful eyes, beautiful legs, a sexy figure, sensual lips, amazing hair and a charming smile? You are late. Three other unshaven competitors had just told her this. It's best to avoid obvious compliments. They won't impress her. Try to be more original.

Say something unexpected new girl: about a radiant smile, a cute mole, moist sparkling eyes, a mysterious look, a melodious voice, a light gait. Focus not only on her appearance, but also on her internal qualities. She is funny, funny, smart, quick-witted, kind, insightful, erudite, crazy, unpredictable. Tell her this.

Have some stories to spare

Girls like to say: “Tell me something interesting.” 70% of your competitors will be confused, but not you. In this case, you have prepared several curious and interesting stories. Depending on the girl, the stories may be told differently. Try to guess what exactly the new baby wants to hear. About travel, your friends, music, art, show business or literature. When communicating, new jokes, quotes and the ability to weave tall tales will come in handy. A prepared, erudite and intelligent man is a stunning and exciting mixture for any woman.

Play and flirt

Be polite to your new baby. She had met enough rude people in her life. A woman falls in love with a man's attitude towards her. Gallantry, tact and politeness are the friends of a gentleman. But this does not mean “bending” under a woman. Only respect for the girl as an individual.

In addition to nobility, you will need the ability to flirt. Excitement, flirting, jokes, intrigue, improvisation, gestures and body language. This is a game that increases the heart rate and blood flow to certain parts of the body.

With all due respect, do not forget to tease the girl without affecting her pride. Be funny, cheeky, teasing.

Showcase your versatility

Athletes talk about sports, musicians talk about music, businessmen talk about business. Talk about a variety of subjects. Don't get carried away by talking about work or past relationships. Jump from topic to topic and try not to bother her with one thing. Give the girl the opportunity to talk about something. This is a conversation, not a monologue. Listen carefully to her words.

Entertain the baby

A sense of humor is a wonderful quality. Don’t be lazy to joke, tell jokes, come up with interesting pastimes. Girls need to be walked, given drive, emotions and a positive mood.

Be unpredictable

Act like good guy and then how bad. Say extraordinary things. Change plans unexpectedly. Offer unusual dates and things. Show emotion. Open up and demonstrate new sides of your character. Say the words: “no” and “I said so.” Scare her with your severity and show tenderness. Lead an active lifestyle and don’t become domesticated. A wild, wayward mustang on the prairie is much better than a sleeping horse in a stall.

She will tremble when she meets a man who is not afraid to be himself. Which is strong and positive. A man of strength and integrity. With dominant behavior. With a smile on your face and a kind heart. She will be emotional and unpredictable with only one goal - to please you.

Let's be honest with ourselves right now. We really want... Very. Since birth. And all our lives we look for ways to receive Love - from parents, from husbands, from children. And just from the world. And the simplest and most obvious is to be a good girl. Be a good daughter to your parents. Do what they ask, obey, behave correctly, don't fight with your brother, sit with your younger ones, share, don't get angry or shout - and so on.

Every good girl has her own set of rules - what she must do and what she has no right to. In many ways, each vault is unique. But if you look into the second part of it, a lot intersects.
A good girl shouldn't:

• Get angry
• Scream
• Cry
• Ask
• Throwing tantrums
• Show
• To be wrong
• Bring twos - and even threes
• Be capricious
• Break out of the general framework

All she has to do is:

• Study
• Help Mother
• To obey the parents
• Work
• Be good
• Be an excellent student
• Do everything right

Twenty, thirty years pass - and everything continues. We also regularly wear “fives” and are very afraid of “twos”. We care about who and what they think about us, what they say about us. We are afraid to refuse anyone, so we help everyone - and then we fall exhausted. We don’t express our desires, don’t talk about our needs, don’t stick our heads out, and are content with little. We achieve a lot, but we feel terrible.

AND good girls don't complain about fate. They pretend that everything is great and super, and sometimes they can cry into the shoulder of only those closest to them. If you haven't forgotten how to cry. If they have these closest ones.

There is nothing more dangerous than this illusion. The illusion that you should never disappoint or offend in your life. That you have no right to be angry and cry, to be dissatisfied.

These girls come to Vedic knowledge - and try to become - it comes easily to them. After all, they know how to endure, learn, achieve good results. They make a list of women's responsibilities - and methodically carry out everything on the list every day.

But inside everything is crying in pain. Because the family sits on the neck, their needs are again ignored, feelings are pushed even deeper, there are only more responsibilities - after all, household work is also added to the usual work. Not instead, but together. And if suddenly you do something poorly, a feeling of guilt appears. And no one’s reproaches are even needed. Your own conscience is enough to completely gnaw yourself.

Emotions cannot go outside - they go inside. All sorts of terrible diseases arise - from stomach ulcers to cancerous tumors. The body turns to stone. Or he has difficulties with weight - after all, emotions can be consumed, or you can stop eating altogether because of them.

There is nothing wrong with helping others. On the contrary, it’s great, and it makes a woman beautiful. But if at the same time the amount of Love inside does not increase, then what is the point in doing things mechanically in order “so that no one gets offended”?

What are these good girls most afraid of? Of course, be bad. To be stupid, unsuccessful, not loved by anyone, not loved by anyone.

What do good girls lack?

And you know what's the saddest thing? It's very difficult to be around such a good girl.

The man next to her always feels not like a prince, but like a dragon. Because even when he is rude to her, she endures it again and again. She never shows her true feelings and hides behind a mask. But he just can’t understand her. And all the time around her he is forced to become “bad”.

Children from such a good mother either run away completely (because they already owe too much), or they sit on their necks all their lives and take advantage of the reliability. They, too, according to the law of balance, have to be bad - even if they try very hard to remain good.

Girlfriends and friends are not real. They don't care how she feels. After all, it doesn’t matter to her. But she will always come to the rescue - and will not ask for anything in return.

So what should we do?

If this is about you, then just... Although this is all very difficult...

• Stop making your bed in the morning. At least for a month. A little chaos in such correctness will only be good
• - find them in the dark basement of your soul - and think at least a little about them, let them be born and come true
• Learn to refuse already. For starters, the closest ones. Colleagues who constantly give their work away. The neighbor who always asks you to re-stick her wallpaper, even though she has a husband. To the friend who always complains about her husband.
• Make mistakes deliberately. Fail the exam. Oversleep for work. Take a vacation at your own expense. Over-salt the borscht at least once - your husband will understand that it’s out of love
• Be different. Experiment. Wear not only strict, perfectly ironed suits, but also frivolous pink dresses, romantic lace capes, loose-fitting dresses, and sometimes - for your husband - sexy minis.

How to become ideal girl? At some point in a relationship, every young beauty asks this question, wanting to please her boyfriend even more or trying to find answers to some questions that torment her. After all, self-improvement is serious and difficult work on oneself, requiring certain efforts and patience. By trying to become better for her lover and taking some action for this, the girl is already on the way to improving her behavior. better side.

Identifying the root of the problem and identifying areas for improvement

In order to start working on yourself and understand how to become the ideal girl for a guy, you need to understand the essence of the problem, if there is one at all. Sometimes these thoughts arise simply because a young lady is trying to somehow improve herself in order to become an ideal for her beloved. But often thoughts about how to change come in view of a specific situation.

The first thing a young lady needs to do in order to decide on the direction of further work on the path of her own evolution is to learn to listen carefully to her man. Only by absorbing his comments, preferences and desires like a sponge will she be able to achieve success in the business she has started and understand how to become an ideal girl.

The second thing the young lady needs to do is to analyze all the points agreed upon by the young man and determine a strategy for her further actions. If his words are reduced to dissatisfaction with her attitude towards him, you need to work on mutual understanding. If it’s a matter of resentment over some girlish mistake, you need to work on your mistakes. If we are talking about a guy’s dissatisfaction with his girlfriend’s behavior, she needs to work on herself and her inner world. And if the thing is that young man If he doesn’t like his girlfriend’s skirts being too short or, for example, her neckline being too deep, she should take care of her appearance.

Work on mistakes

Having identified the root of the problem and realizing that the guy is still angry about some mistake his beloved made, she urgently needs to start taking actions to make amends. First, apologize for your mistake: if you lied, promise that it will never happen again; if you disobeyed and went to the party without his consent, promise that she won’t do that again. And, most importantly, your words in in this case needs to be confirmed with actions. Then the young man will see that his comments were heard and understood, and will be proud of himself and his beloved.

Working on mutual understanding

While thinking about how to become an ideal girl, you must also accept the realization that relationships are work. And the basis of this work is mutual understanding. And a young lady will never be able to become an ideal for her man if she does not accept him as he is, trying to change him or limiting his personal space. Learning to listen and hear your beloved is where the door opens on the path to a single view of the world in one direction.

Working on your inner world

To understand how to become the ideal girl in a relationship, you need to look at yourself from the outside. Sometimes, female representatives underestimate the truthfulness of the words spoken to them by a man. But the fact is that there is no smoke without fire: if a young man made a remark to his beloved that she was doing something wrong, then there is a reason for this. And it’s worth thinking about how you behave, what you say - perhaps from the outside it looks incorrect.

Then how to become ideal? Advice for girls in search of answers to this question involves following some rules in working on themselves:

Working on your appearance

In addition to internal changes, you should not forget about your aesthetic beauty. If so Young lady I wondered how to become an ideal girl in appearance, you need to listen to your man’s opinion on this matter. And if he says that this lipstick is too provocative and does not suit your face, then you need to put it away and not use it anymore.

What are the main points to follow when working on your appearance:

• be clean - men really don’t like messy young ladies, so hygiene should come first;
• to be well-groomed - you need to try to dress with taste and look neat; no one says to buy expensive clothes or accessories - not everyone can afford it, but every self-respecting woman is obliged to look well-groomed;
• go in for sports - men love not only their ears and stomach, they really like to contemplate beautiful female forms, and the “old”, “good” gym and exercise equipment will help to achieve this;
• get rid of bad habits- young people often smoke or drink themselves, but at the same time they are firmly convinced that “they can”; the smell of cigarettes and alcohol repels a man from a woman, you need to remember this and try to eliminate the craving for such things.

What you should absolutely not do in a relationship with a guy

To complete a self-improvement course on the topic of how to become an ideal girl, you need to know some taboos in relationships, the presence of which can ruin all the previously done work on yourself:

• you cannot limit a guy’s personal space - in no case should you forbid him to see his friends, because this is a sure way to damage the relationship;

• you shouldn’t speak badly about his mother - after all, a mother is a mother, and no matter what she is, she is the woman most beloved by a young man in his life, so you need to establish contact with her, and not nip him in the bud;
• there is no need to be offended over trifles - if a girl ignores the guy’s attempts to make peace and constantly rejects him, filling her own price, so to speak, - in the end this can lead to the fact that the young man simply gets tired of looking for a reason to make peace, and he retreats.

Being ideal for your man is quite simple. You need to be able to work on relationships and mistakes in them.