Most often, men and women quarrel because they cannot understand each other. Different views and feelings result in scandals that can separate even the most loving hearts. To get rid of disagreements forever, modern psychologists recommend an unusual method - “gender substitution.” Its essence is simple: you must learn to look at all problems through the eyes of your partner. Such an experiment can not only settle relationships, but also lead you to the registry office. So…
Learn from films
“Sex reversal” is a favorite cinematic technique. Psychologists are sure that watching the transformation of actors is not only funny, but also instructive. After all, it is by finding themselves in someone else’s body that the heroes become closer and find harmony in their relationships.
“Gender reassignment” does not require surgical intervention. This is a fascinating psychological training that will help a couple become closer. Men and women are very different by nature. That's why we are called the opposite sex, but if lovers plan long and serious relationship, then they just need to feel “in someone else’s shoes.” If in films, “sexual transformation” happens magically, then in life you need to make every effort.
Option one: by mutual consent.
For whom: you were tormented by constant quarrels, and you both came to the conclusion that you need to do something about it.
Experiment algorithm:
You should sit down and discuss your problems and then make some kind of “agreement”. It is important that everyone takes responsibility and, as far as possible, tries to take the experiment seriously. Gender Swap should be a fun game for you, but with strict rules. The first thing to do is think about the time for which you are “trying on someone else’s image.” It’s best not to overplay it: take a day, or two at most. Believe me, this will be enough for you!
If you live together, then let the “reincarnation” come down to the following: you exchange responsibilities. If a woman cooked dinner, now it is the man’s responsibility; if he parked the car in the garage, now she does it. It will be better if the participants in the experiment write down all their daily responsibilities on paper and solemnly hand them over to each other.
Results:
The goal of “sex change” is to learn to understand each other. Delve into your partner’s problems, try to figure out why he does this, what he likes, what annoys him and why. To experience for himself what brings him joy and what saddens him.
Option two: one-goal game
For whom: Your partner is very dear to you and, in principle, your relationship suits you, but sometimes there are annoying moments when you absolutely do not understand his (her) actions and actions. Such “little things” scare you, but you don’t dare discuss your complaints out loud. Justifying it this way: why quarrel once again, because everything is fine with you.
Experiment algorithm:
Indeed, sometimes it is better not to “exaggerate”. And before you start a showdown with your partner, it’s better to first try to understand yourself. This is where “sex change” comes in handy more than ever. Try for a certain time (for example, a day) in any situation to act as “your other half” would act. For example, your partner is a reliable person who always helps everyone. So you try on this role. find out whether it is hard or easy.
Another possibility: your partner spends a lot of time on the Internet. Try to live on the World Wide Web for a while and figure out what fascinates him so much there. The main task: during the experiment, do not compare your actions and the actions of your partner, completely forget about your “I” and try to understand what pleases and what upsets your “other half”.
Results:
Changing “yin” to “yang” (or vice versa) will in any case make you more flexible, and this is the first step towards mutual understanding between people. Try to use the acquired knowledge “for good.” Mutual understanding is a subtle art; in order to master it, you need to be able to listen to both yourself and people.
Naturally, each parent is interested in the exemplary behavior of their child and gets angry if the child is disobedient. In modern society, adults burdened with their worries do not even try to delve into the reasons for children’s bad behavior, resolving issues of upbringing thoughtlessly, “saving time.” This leads to the fact that the adult side absolutely does not understand the other, the children’s side, does not want to see and prefers not to hear the children’s opinion. As a result, children cease to perceive their parents as loved ones, whom they can turn to in difficult times, receive support and advice.
It is important for parents to get results, and immediate ones, - the main thing is that the child does not interfere, does not get in the way, and does not interfere too much." adult life"With such an attitude, parents create a gap between their own world and the world of their children. Such a situation must necessarily lead to inevitable conflicts either in early childhood or at the stage of growing up.
An example of a correct relationship is a situation where, say, a father trusts his child with his tools, does some housework with his son, and treats him as an equal. Such interaction always gives excellent results, even if at first the child may break or spoil something.
Adults often do not attach importance to remarks and harsh words, which in the depths of a child’s consciousness grow into phantoms of inability or even complexes. Good word and the desire of an adult to pay attention only to the child’s merits form in him faith in his own strength, are able to reorient the fear complex “I won’t succeed” to the worldly wisdom “if it doesn’t work out now, it will work out later, because you learn from mistakes.”
I have met many people who, in childhood, were strictly and importunately taught by their parents to do everything correctly, punished if they did not succeed, and in the future all these parental attempts led to the exact opposite result.
I remember an incident from my life that became a lesson for me for the future. Once, after another stormy showdown with my youngest son, we decided to reconsider the whole situation, rewinding the video of what happened, like a film, to the beginning. When we checked together, we discovered that we couldn’t hear each other at all.
I realized that my words “immediately turn off the computer and get ready” were perceived by my son as a demonstration of the strength of an adult. He needed some time to complete something important. However, his answer: “I’m not ready to turn off the computer yet” was perceived by me as a refusal based on a whim. The reason for the conflict was that we were in a hurry to visit and I completely disregarded my son’s interests.
In a calm situation, I was not afraid to admit to my son where I was wrong. This set an example for him to be just as flexible with us. This is how we worked through other conflict situations, changing our position offended person the ability to listen to the arguments of the other side.
It turned out that in this way we can learn to understand each other. I received great pleasure when, from conversations with my son, I began to understand how he perceives life. I realized how often we undeservedly offend children, how we lack in life to take a closer look at their world, hidden from us behind our “adult desires.”
Children develop through play, they seem to try on the words and actions of their parents, it is important for them to be included in real life and they demand that we allow them to participate in it. We can pass on our life experiences to our children in the form of play, but we often do not understand that communication with children benefits us too. Our children raise us, make us wiser, more mature, more responsible.
Parents often complain that they have lost respect in the eyes of their children, that their love for their children remains unrequited. Love and respect must be earned - and not by an abundance of toys, or permissiveness, but by showing the child that his life, his fate concerns us more than our own. Then the time spent on education will turn into the joy of love and mutual understanding.
People communicate with each other all their lives, using not only words, but also facial expressions and gestures. During the lesson, children analyze what helps in communication and what hinders. Participants observe people's facial expressions and gestures and learn to determine the state of another person. Children work in groups; during the lesson, participants can discuss within the group and express their opinions.
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Golneva Olga Borisovna,
social teacher MBOU "Secondary school No. 16 with in-depth study individual items» Stary Oskol,
Nekrasova Natalya Anatolyevna, social teacher MBOU "Secondary school No. 16 with in-depth study of individual subjects" Stary Oskol
“How to learn to understand each other”
(according to teaching materials “All colors except black”)
Class hour for 6th grade students
Topic: “How to learn to understand each other.”
Target: When communicating with other people, learn to use the external manifestations of the interlocutor in a conversation (posture, gestures, facial expressions) for more productive communication.
Progress of the lesson.
- Introduction.
People communicate with each other all their lives, using not only words, but also facial expressions and gestures. Today we will try to learn to understand each other better. We will work in two groups; during the lesson, participants can deliberate within the group, express their opinions when given the floor, and listen carefully to each other.
- Warm up.
There are situations in life when you are offended, quarrel, and do not understand each other. This makes the class uncomfortable, but I really want friendship to reign, so that everyone is in a good mood. Now we will try to find something in common that can unite you even more, unite you, and improve relationships in the class. Try to be active and sincere.
Attention! I will ask:
- Stand up for those who like to relax.
- Raise your right hand, those who consider themselves inquisitive.
- Cover your ears with your palms for those who don’t like being shouted at.
- Those who can treat others kindly, pat themselves on the back.
- Clap your hands for those who consider themselves cheerful.
- Those who consider themselves brave, stomp your feet.
- Stand up, those who want the class to always be friendly.
- Main part.
- The task “What hinders - what helps.”
You probably noticed that there are both similarities and differences between us. Now we will try to find out what each of us expects from others in communication, and what is unpleasant for you. First task: underline with one line what, in your opinion, prevents people from understanding each other, with two - what hinders you:
Highlight what you think helps in communication:
- politeness;
- clarity of presentation of thoughts, construction of phrases and sentences;
- brevity;
- expressive intonation;
- consistency, logic of statements;
- use of familiar words and concepts in speech;
- absence of foreign words in speech;
- friendly facial expression;
- open look;
- interest of the interlocutor;
- smile.
2) Game “Understand Me”
In the first task we talked mainly about communicating using words. What else helps people communicate with each other? (facial expressions and gestures).
The next game is “Understand Me.” Let's now practice using observation of facial expressions and gestures to determine the state of another person.
You are offered cards with the name of a feeling or emotion, you must depict it using facial expressions and gestures, and the rest of the participants must guess. The one who is the first of the guessers to correctly name the depicted feeling becomes the leader.
Now, in your notebook, write down the emotions depicted under the pictures.
- Game "How We Listen"
You are all students. What important quality should a student have to be successful? (The ability to listen).
In the next task, a story will be read to you: one team is asked to portray one of the types of listeners, and the other is asked to guess.
- The man listens attentively and with interest.
- The person is indifferent to the topic of conversation.
- The person is offended and does not want to continue the conversation.
- The man is angry, angry.
- The person does not agree with your opinion and is determined to continue the argument.
In your notebooks, match the name of the listener type with its picture.
- Conclusion.
Our lesson has come to an end. And now I would like to hear from you what you remember and liked most.
Practical lesson “How to learn to understand each other”
Goal: to introduce children to various forms cooperation.
develop the ability to understand and accept another person;
develop the ability to communicate non-verbally;
develop communication skills;
cultivate a friendly attitude towards each other,
help overcome inappropriate forms of behavior and relieve emotional stress.
l. Psychological mood.
Children sit in a circle.
Good afternoon I'm very glad to meet you. Today we will talk about respect and cooperation. Each of us expresses ourselves differently in manners, conversation, and behavior.
2. Main part.
1. Game "Snowball".
Standing in a circle, the child says his name; the neighbor on the left calls the previous one
name and yours; the next child says the name of the first child, the second child and his own, etc.
Conclusion: everyone was pleased to hear their name.
2. Conversation in a circle.
What is respect? Each child expresses his or her opinion.
Conclusion: respect is a respectful attitude based on recognition of someone's merits.
3. Game situations.
“What will you do?” (task cards are in the envelope).
The cards contain different situations that need to be played out.
Let an adult through the door.
Contact a stranger with questions: “How to get to the square.
Gorky?
If you were called an offensive nickname, your actions.
Why is it rude to eat while talking?
Ask your neighbor to borrow a pencil.
Bottom line: Let's remember that behavior says a lot
to others.
4. Game "Set".
Children stand in a circle. The palm of the right hand is placed on the palm of the left hand of the neighbor standing on the right. The palm of the left hand is placed under the right palm of the neighbor standing on the left. Children take turns talking to each other
compliments, looking into each other's eyes. After accepting a compliment
you need to say “THANK YOU”.
Conclusion: a compliment is a flattering review, praise, pleasant words.
5. Conversation in a circle.
Does the card have the word “collaboration” written on it?
How do you understand the word “collaboration”?
Give every child the opportunity to express their opinion.
Conclusion: cooperation - working together, taking part in a common cause.
6. Work in a creative workshop.
(Invite the children to sit at the tables)
There is a pair of mittens (blanks) on the tables.
You and I are designers. We need to apply a beautiful
pattern so that one person can wear them. Children perform
work in pairs. After completing the work, the guys come out and defend their design project, telling how they worked (agreed, drew).
Bottom line: Did they succeed? Why? What is important for making a pair of mittens different people? (Agree, be able to cooperate, respect other opinions)
3. Summary of the lesson.
Did you like the lesson, what new things did you learn?
