How to start life from scratch? An easy way to start a new life. Start all over again

Our life is a series of unforeseen circumstances and different opportunities. We always have a choice, we decide what is useful for us and what we should refuse. But if you find that your existence has gradually turned into chaos, which is impossible to understand, you need to change your life. Believe me, arriving in a confusion of thoughts and feelings, weighed down by your defeats and mistakes, it is very difficult to improve your life and move on. So how to get out of this whirlpool? You need to make a conscious decision and start living from scratch. This technique was developed by psychologists to help a person understand his situation and help him get out of this “hole.” You shouldn’t be led by negative emotions and defeatist attitudes; the sooner you decide to deal with the past, the faster you will achieve success and happiness!

"Filter" technique

How to start a new life from scratch? First of all, you must understand that change always requires some changes and even sacrifices. What does a white sheet mean? This metaphor expresses the definitions of further perception of both the world and everything new. From now on, you must clearly “filter” all events and people. You should only allow in important events that can bring positive changes. What does this mean: you give up old unpleasant connections, be it relationships with loved ones that do not suit you and burden you. You must change activities that do not bring you pleasure or bring up unpleasant memories.

At the first stage, it will be very useful to completely abstract from reality for a few days. Dedicate these days only to yourself, think about the past and clearly define why you need to change everything. When all the unpleasant events appear before your eyes, you can talk about them, remember them, cry and even feel sorry for yourself a little. After this, you must mentally say goodbye to them. You can get rid of things that bring you back to difficult life situations. Or you can list them on paper and burn them, after this event you must declare to yourself that all bridges have been burned! And even if you want to go back to the past, it will be simply impossible to do so: back it up with action, for example, erase old phones or get rid of letters. The first stage is the most difficult, but it is this stage that gives the strength to move on.

I'm not afraid anymore!

Fears often shape a person’s personality, that is, they make him indecisive and closed to new achievements. Over the years, they turn into insurmountable complexes, and it is quite difficult to get out of this situation. Do you know how complexes are formed? These are often instilled and imposed opinions from the outside! Isn’t it a shame to realize that other people influenced your destiny? However, changing this situation is not only possible, but also necessary. The most important point is the ability to express your feelings and emotions. Don't worry about how others will react to them, don't be afraid of judgment. If you feel something, talk about it, there is no one to tell - internal dialogue or a psychologist will help. But under no circumstances close yourself off from the world.

Understand that the structure of the world is a neutral system, but it depends on your perception whether it will become negative or positive for you. Starting a new milestone in life, everyone is afraid of the unpredictable consequences of their actions. But, unfortunately, no one can give you a guarantee! And is it necessary, because you yourself take responsibility. There is such a useful exercise: sit down, relax, and try to imagine your life in 10 years. But exactly the life that you have today. And this has nothing to do with fantasy; analyze where your current situation will lead you: for example, salary, personal life, loved ones. Just don’t lie to yourself that everything will be fine and will “sort out” by itself! Do you want to cry and hopelessness fills your soul? So, it is necessary to act! List all the fears that prevent you from moving forward, and you will see that half of them are completely unfounded. Don't let them capture you in the “net” of hopelessness and despair.

Life is urgent

Understand that the longer you delay the moment of starting to move along a new path, the further and more illusory your new happy life will be. Don't wait for a specific date or a new week - today and now is the most important day. How to get the first “push” that will spur you on? If you're tired of a job where you can't realize yourself, quit today. Don't be afraid, because you have now decided to live differently. Be sure to break off the relationship that is bothering you. Understand that this will not change over time. You can't fight for someone else, fight only for yourself! From now on, try to enjoy every minute. If you are used to sitting at home and feeling sorry for yourself, this needs to stop.

Get up and go for a walk, watch how people are rushing around, how others are enjoying nature and good weather. Everyone strives for something, so why can't you do the same? Give yourself new sensations: go to the theater or cinema, to an exhibition. Raise your vitality, play sports or do something bold: go on a trip. Looking for new opportunities to realize yourself. From now on, do only what you like: learn, develop, attend trainings and seminars. Change yourself from the inside and never stop for a single minute. After all, the world presents different opportunities, and it will not wait until you decide to act!

Steps towards something new

How to start a new life from scratch, while carrying the burden of past mistakes and failures? Getting rid of reminders that pull you back:

We change the usual interior, and, if possible, the wardrobe;
Try to get rid of at least one of your habits, and come up with useful “fads” for yourself, for example, never go to bed in a bad mood. Spend your evenings usefully: read, write essays or learn a foreign language. Leave no time for moping;
Get your affairs in order. You shouldn’t start life with unresolved minor problems. Finish a long-abandoned project, knit a sweater, or generally do something that weighs you down.
New acquaintances - it is very important to change your social circle, do not be afraid to meet people halfway! Pleasant acquaintances will radically change your world, you will receive new impressions and a charge in order to change your life every day;
New appearance. Even if it is a radically different look, don’t be shy about making an interesting hairstyle that will attract attention.

Any mistakes are a valuable lesson in life. From now on, think of them that way. Be glad that you now know exactly what not to do. Every person deserves a new happy life, just don’t rush and be disappointed ahead of time! You need to constantly move towards your goal and then you will definitely succeed!

Image: nattu (flickr.com)

How often have you said to yourself: “That’s enough.” I’m starting my life again on Monday!”? And how many people make a similar promise to themselves on New Year’s Eve or their next birthday. Even the happiest and most prosperous person has moments in life when he wants to give up everything. I want to cross out the past and completely start my life from scratch. Why do people sometimes so passionately want to say goodbye to their past and embark on a new, unknown voyage through life? How to start a new life and change yourself? Such a desire can arise from extreme overwork, satiety with everyday life, or as a result of experienced stress. There are many reasons for such drastic changes and they are all purely individual. But, having decided to say goodbye to the past, many are faced with the problem of not knowing how to start a new life and change themselves.

After all, a significant period of life was lived according to certain principles and motives, and was aimed at achieving any specific goals. And a new life implies total changes in all spheres of human life and activity. Where to find the strength for this and where to start such global changes?

Reasons to say goodbye to the past

Of course, it is impossible to single out any reasons that are relevant for everyone. But there are many typical and similar situations in which people simply need to start over.

One of the most common reasons is divorce of a married couple, separation after a long relationship. Most people who find themselves in a similar situation quite logically wonder how to live further. Most likely, life will have to start over. Reconsider your usual home life or build your life completely from scratch. Get used to your new family situation, learn to live independently, without a partner. It is generally accepted that when parting, it is doubly difficult for those who were abandoned. This means that they will have to work twice as hard to figure out how to start a new life after a divorce.

Another reason is the death of a loved one. In such a situation, before starting a new life and changing oneself, a bereaved person needs to cope with a difficult state of mind, overcome depression and stress. After all, such psychological traumas are characterized by a state of apathy and constant fatigue, and building a new way of life requires a large amount of energy and vitality.

How to motivate yourself to change

The most compelling reasons for a person to have a desire to start life anew are stressful situations and complete dissatisfaction with the current way of life.

Whatever these reasons may be that prompted a person to cross out everything past, first one should clearly understand and fully accept one fact. ,Negative past experiences are like a suitcase without a handle: it’s a shame to throw it away and hard to carry. If you have learned all the life lessons you need from such an experience, then you need to be able to say goodbye to depressing memories without regret. You need to be able to forget the events of past years and stop engaging in reflection, endlessly analyzing your past. Instead, you need to evaluate your present and develop ways to start a new life.

“The past is as dead as a broken gramophone record. Chasing the past is a thankless task, and if you want to be convinced of this, go to the sites of your past battles.”
Ernest Hemingway

How to let go of the past

If you continue to carry the burden of past years behind you and constantly return to the past in your thoughts, then starting a new life will not only be problematic, but almost impossible. But many people find it very difficult to part with memories, even if they are sad and painful.

How to let go of the past and start living again?

Stop replaying possible scenarios of past situations in your head. Eliminate from your thoughts the formulation: “But if only then, I would have done this.” What is done cannot be returned, so don’t fill your head with useless thoughts.
Try not to make mistakes in the present, so as not to regret them later. For some reason, human memory is designed in such a way that negative memories linger longer than happy moments. By your actions today you create your past. And it is in your power to make it cloudless and pleasant.
Drive away the fear of change. Give yourself the mindset that your new life will be much better and happier. If you yourself believe in it, then, undoubtedly, it will be so.
Carry out an audit of your home, getting rid of all things that remind you of the past. The same can be done in relation to the people around you with whom, for some personal reason, you have long wanted to stop communicating.
Love yourself. After all, for the person you love, you always want to do everything in the best possible way, to protect you from all troubles. Become that person for yourself.

Where to start a new life

An easy way to start a new life is to follow the tips below.

First of all, follow the rule of immediacy. Start a new life not on Monday, not on the first of the new month, and not on the New Year. If you have already decided to change, now is the time to do it. Most likely, you are delaying the moment because you are subconsciously succumbing to the fear of change. Remember that in any business the most important thing is to start taking action, and then changes will move rapidly, like a snowball.
The next task after parting with the past will be saying goodbye to the present. If a person is thinking about how to start a new life and change himself, then it logically follows that this individual is not completely satisfied with his present. Think about what and who you would like to get rid of, what to change. You can make a list of all this and symbolically burn it - by eliminating the material confirmation of your present, it will be easier to let it go morally.
Change your habits. It is better to get rid of negative habits altogether, but you should also reconsider ordinary household activities that you do purely automatically. For example, instead of your usual morning cup of coffee, start taking a cold shower. Are you used to sitting in a chair after work and aimlessly watching TV shows? Try not turning on the TV at all. Yes, at first it will not be easy, you will have to step over yourself, however, positive results will not take long to arrive. After two months - according to psychologists, this is exactly how long it takes to get rid of old habits and develop new ones - you will notice that you have become a completely different person.
Change your hobby, find new hobbies. How to start a new life and change yourself if you don’t start trying to do what you have long wanted to do, but were afraid or couldn’t afford? A new life is the time to make all your wildest dreams come true.
Change your social circle. Make new friends, meet people whose communication brings you pleasure and benefit. Strive to communicate with positive and successful people - they will motivate you to strive for your ideal and achieve your goals.
Make drastic changes, like changing your home or job. Perhaps you wanted to change your activities as a whole, try something completely new. If you have long dreamed of mastering cycling, then why not change your office chair to a bicycle saddle.
Don't be afraid of failure. Everything in this world is learned through trial and error. And if you stumble on something, this is not a reason to stop moving forward.
Do some work on yourself. And do this constantly. After all, permanent self-development is the right path to success and harmony in the soul.

Changing ourselves - 10 effective methods

In order to find the strength and energy to change your life for the better, you need to make adjustments to your personality, change your character and habits. Otherwise, how can you change your life for the better while remaining the same? After all, you, exactly as you are now, have created a present for yourself that does not suit you, and which you are striving to radically reshape in a new way. If you have not yet developed your own individual strategy on how to start a new life and change yourself, then check out the selection of advice from psychologists given below in our article.

10 methods on how to change for the better:

Cultivate positive thinking. If you constantly tune yourself in and think in a positive way, then over time you will notice that the world around you accepts you with joy. The well-known psychological law of reciprocity: what you give is what you receive.
Learn to see the positive in others, try to become an optimist. Surely, you yourself enjoy communicating with smiling and hospitable people. So why not become the same yourself, so that people will be drawn to you.
Do not forget about your appearance - after all, appearance perfectly reflects internal changes. You should not suddenly and radically change your appearance if you are not ready for this. A neat and clean appearance will be enough to win over those around you and feel comfortable yourself.
Eliminate bad habits. Smoking and alcohol are active depressants that have an irritating effect on the psyche. It is difficult for a person who is dependent on something to find harmony with his inner self.
Stick to your daily routine. Sleep at least 8 hours a day, train yourself to get up and go to bed at approximately the same time. The daily routine has a beneficial effect on both the mental and physical health of a person.
Switch to proper nutrition. Down with junk food like fast food. Include exclusively healthy and natural products in your menu. In addition to helping you avoid gastrointestinal problems and improve your overall well-being, eating healthy is an incredibly practical and low-cost option.
Play sports. You don't have to torture yourself with grueling workouts in the gym. A light jog or daily morning exercise will be enough. Even minimal physical activity will keep the body in good shape.
Become the master of your emotions. A restrained person who knows how to control his inner impulses is less susceptible to everyday stress. This means it is easier for him to adapt to changes and new living conditions.
Find motivation. If you clearly know why you need to change, then all changes and work on yourself will be easy.
Engage in self-development. Read books, listen to good music, improve in what you love. Self-development is an excellent driving force that makes a person better and better every day.

How to start a new life and change yourself?

This is where you should start with yourself. All changes in life begin in our head. Only by setting the right psychological attitude can you make changes in your life.

“People are so afraid to take a step towards a new life that they are ready to close their eyes to everything that does not suit them. But this is even scarier: to wake up one day and realize that everything nearby is not the same.”
Confucius

We hope that in our article you were able to find answers for yourself on how to start a new life and change yourself. According to the famous saying, if you think something needs to change, then you don’t. Cast aside all doubts and fears, and boldly move forward to a new life and new victories. Remember that only you yourself are the creator of your own destiny, and only you can decide whether to be content with the gray present or turn the page and open up to a new, better life.

For each of us, a new day is a new chapter in life. Do you feel like you've reached a dead end? Do you want to start over and change your life? Feel like Bill Murray's character in a movie Groundhog Day who had to relive the same day over and over again? Change is always scary, but everyone deserves to live the way they see fit. There are several ways to reconsider your life and start over again with a clean slate.

Steps

Part 1

Look back at the past

Accept your past. It is impossible to start life over if you continue to cling to the past. It is important to accept the situation that has developed in a relationship, at work, in family or other aspect of life.

For every event there is a reason. Nobody says that a person is powerless and every moment is “predetermined” by fate. It would be more correct to say that each situation has only the meaning that we attribute to it. It is only our perception that turns any event or moment into an uplifting or crushing experience.

Analyze your failures and successes. You cannot leave life behind and “swallow the grudge” if events do not develop according to plan. Think: “What did I do right in this situation or circumstances?”

Don't announce that you are starting over. Just take action. You don't need to voice your decisions to change your life. Don't tell others about your plans or ask what you should do. Often in moments of doubt, we seek advice to make sure that a decision has been made correctly or to change our intentions. Your life is only YOUR life. Move forward - and people will change with you. For that matter, this is the only way to weed out unsuitable or strangers.

Part 2

Define your purpose. Thinking about the meaning of life is your first important step towards big changes.

Set goals, make decisions. First, determine your purpose in life and overall goals, and then decide how to achieve your goals and what changes may be necessary. Do you want to break up with your current partner? Move to another city? Continue studying?
- Set short, medium and long term personal goals. Write down your decisions and leave them in a visible place (on the refrigerator door or on the bedroom mirror).
- Organize your life. Change will not happen if there is no order in life. If you know exactly the desired changes and goals, you can draw up an action plan.
Take a new path. Surprise yourself and do something differently. This way you will see yourself and your abilities from a new perspective.

Your new motto is feeling important. Live in the moment and realize that nothing else matters. Give him your full attention. This is your reality. When such a moment is over, move on to the next one. You are alive? Yes. This means the moment will be lived successfully! Each subsequent moment will bring you one step closer to an active life.

Evaluate yourself soberly. A person cannot know everything. You make mistakes. Just because you can change the oil in your engine, cook a gourmet dinner, or understand macroeconomics doesn't make you a good or bad person. It just means that you understand certain issues. Do you strive for knowledge or want to prove something to others? Think about why this is important to you. Does it give you joy? If the answer is negative, it is better to leave this activity! It is impossible to be able to do everything, and it is not necessary.

Rely on others and ask for help. Accept the idea that you don't need to know everything, and then look at all the things you try to do that require more skill or don't interest you. A professional can do a better job than you: just pay someone to change your oil or redecorate your bedroom. Plan your time wisely and do what you really can do on your own.

It doesn’t matter how many times you fall, it doesn’t matter how many times you get up, this seemingly simple but very important truth in life is understood by most people superficially, otherwise we would all have an indomitable character. However, this is not true, and most people are ready to give up after the first failure, and in some cases, failure does not require you to start over, it is enough that you continue further. But what’s the matter, why is people’s psyche so weak, since by nature we are all fighters, dedicated to survival and achieving positive results for ourselves? Yes, everything is very simple, there is no point in straining yourself until your situation really becomes so terrible that you will have to act out of necessity. Let’s say you’ve been doing something for several years, and then suddenly all your ideas collapse, how mentally depressed will you be in this case and will it be difficult for you to start all over again, because this is possible again after years of work? Of course, it will be hard for you, hard on your soul and hard to decide, no matter what your idea is, it may lose meaning for you if years of work have gone down the drain.

This is understandable, since it is natural, but strength of character in this case will depend on the objectivity of your view of the situation, that is, if necessary, you will still have to do it, there is no point in retreating. Having suffered a thousand failures in a row, what actually can keep you from the thousand first attempt, its meaninglessness, or perhaps an alternative to it? The only thing that can be senseless is the desire to give up and crawl into the bushes with your tail between your legs, but this will not fix anything, and in some cases there is no alternative. Of course, there is always a choice, but this choice is limited to two positions, retreat and surrender or continuation of the fight. If you want to live a good, decent life, then you will have to fight, there is no other way out, this is how this world works, and no matter how much you have to start all over again, you will do it simply because you need to. In addition, as practice shows, each subsequent attempt to create something is always better than the previous one, which is why there are two types of people in this life - creators and destroyers, since destroyers are also creators in their own way, they stimulate more significant creation.

The essence of this article is not to convey to you the idea that has already become banal that you cannot give up and you can always start over, but to tune your psyche to this wave, showing you the simplicity of making such a decision. It’s actually not difficult to decide on a second and tenth attempt if you don’t bother yourself with the idea that failure is something bad. Every time something changes in your life, these changes always provide an opportunity to grow from the old to the new, more perfect. Imagine a situation when, having lived with a person most of your life, you find out that he betrayed you, or it doesn’t matter. Will it be difficult for you to change everything upside down, send this person to hell and start all over again? Yes, it’s hard, but that’s why it’s hard, because you have such prospects in front of you, you can change your life for a much better side. Firstly, there will be novelty in it, interest will appear in it, you will look for new relationships, no matter if they are better than the previous ones or worse, you will simply move forward and not stand still, living in the past.

Secondly, you will see that there is no situation that does not have such a drastic solution, there is no need to compare what is better, hold on to the old or go to the new, life simply gives you a chance to change everything, and if you are betrayed, then this is a signal to your determination, this is a signal telling you about new opportunities that you should turn your attention to and to which you need to switch. To understand this better, you need to give up thoughts of stability, and not hold on to anything, for fear of losing it. Everything passes, and this too will pass, as the wise King Solomon used to say. We don’t need any stability, we don’t need any permanence, the only thing that should be stable in our life is our development, our desire for the best, our thinking, which should not stand still, it should constantly develop. And stability, which is stagnation, a swamp, is not stability, it is slow, and sometimes quite rapid degradation. So look into the future, don’t try to stop time, and even more so, don’t try or even want to reverse it - you don’t need it, none of us need it. Why do you and I need to stop time? After all, it is thanks to him that we experience life! Think more practically, if you want to come to something new and better, then completely abandon the old, especially when it itself refuses you. You don’t have to give it up right away; you can do it gradually, to the best of your ability. Well, how can you give up the old if you don’t destroy it and start building everything anew? In some cases, working with people to change their attitudes towards life, I recommended that they not only not be afraid of changes, but also arrange them themselves, and more and more often each time. This may seem somewhat irresponsible, but it fundamentally changes the human psyche.

That is, I recommended that a person working at a certain job try as hard as possible there, achieve certain successes and possibly a promotion, but after two years of work they must quit it, nicely with thanks to their superiors, but quit and go start all over again, and at a completely different job. Also in your personal life, every two years, you need to change the person who is next to you, although this must be done without being married, if because of such decisions he may somehow suffer. Marriage, and the family formed on its basis, nevertheless, I believe, should not be a bargaining chip in the personal growth of one person, unless, of course, this family is normal, and not a pathetic semblance of it. A normal family and friends are responsibility, this is our ability to be responsible not only for ourselves, but also for other people, this is our desire and ability to take care not only of ourselves, but also of other people, this is one of the indicators of our maturity. Therefore, a normal person should take his family seriously and not sacrifice it solely for the sake of personal interests. In general, a family man should behave more responsibly and try to make more thoughtful decisions. But a non-family man can be bolder, because when he decides to radically change his life, if he makes mistakes, he risks only his own interests; no one except himself will suffer if he fails. Such a person should try with all his might to surround himself with more serious, more promising, more interesting and intelligent people, next to whom he himself will grow. Moreover, after the first such changes in your life, it is necessary to reduce the time for making such a decision in the future, well, let’s say by six months, this is approximately. That is, when you come to a completely new job, you try to work at it as efficiently as possible, then you quit and look for a new job, new people, not after two years, but after a year and a half, then after a year, and then at least six months later. The dynamics of such changes, which are under your control, will make you a more self-confident person, because you will feel like the master of your life, and most importantly, you will see how simple and correct everything in life is if you don’t stand still.

Life requires change, and not conservative stagnation in the head, when people are afraid of even the most minor changes, and the thought that it is necessary to start all over again terrifies them. There may be a moment when, in the process of your changes, not all of them may be for the better, which is quite obvious, because, say, having achieved certain results at one job, and then quitting it, you can start working at a less prestigious one, and less paid work, which is quite natural. And the point here is not that you exchanged the best for the worst, but that you did not have the intelligence to exchange the best for even better, train until you learn how to do this. But the training here consists, first of all, in realizing that it is not a problem to change everything, that is, you must see your possibilities, which are not limited by time, or by the situation, or by anything at all. Linear growth in this case does not occur in objective reality, in it everything changes somewhat chaotically, existence develops cyclically, and linear growth occurs within you, and this is much more important for us. It is we who must, for our own sake, move up the ladder, and not rush in different directions.

From hired work, you can come to business, or rather, you should do this by making as many attempts as it takes to learn to take care of yourself, and not feed from someone else’s hand. But in business there may be times when you lose everything, you go bankrupt or your business is taken away from you, it doesn’t matter, you shouldn’t think about what you have, otherwise the fear of losing it all will haunt you, you should always keep it in mind a situation in which you start all over again. In order to understand how simple and most importantly it is correct, when having a business, as in the case of work, give it up, sell it and start another one from the very beginning, it will definitely be better than the previous one. This way you will strengthen your will, by realizing your control over the situation, and also by realizing that your possibilities are limitless.

You can start over as much as you need, and you will always achieve a positive result, since it will simply be a pattern for you, and not the will of fate. This is the main idea, you don’t have to find the strength in yourself to start all over again if necessary, or to continue doing what you’re doing without giving up. You just have to start and continue, because that’s what you have to do—you have to, not someone else. That is, you should do something without acute feelings and emotions, simply making the process itself a part of your life, in which this life itself lies. And most importantly, you need to get rid of the fear of everything new, of any changes in your life, for which, friends, be the legislators of the new and change everything in your life yourself, by the power of your will. If you have the opportunity, then be sure to change everything around you; if this is not possible, then make gradual changes in your life. Try not to catch up with time, but to go ahead of it, then you will have nothing to fear. The beauty of life is that in it we have the opportunity to change the reality that exists around us, feeling alive thanks to this, in the broadest sense of the word.